dissonance

one of the reasons i like traveling is because it takes me away. not just physically, but away from my usual habits and and rituals, away from the things i do to fill my day. away from the life i know, so that i can know more about life.

it's a different box, with different insulators, but they are not mine. what remains lies at the core of what makes us human.

i didn't think it was time yet; this time i was enjoying my numbness, when it was nevertheless smashed around me. and what to do but let that empty space inside of me open up. and it does so, eliminating in the process the things which were not good enough.

and here is the heart of a matter- there is a dissonance between the big picture, and small details. you know what i mean. it's like one of those pictures everybody used to have in high school, where a thousand smaller pictures, seemingly unrelated, make up each shade and gradient of a much larger picture.

how then do we engage in the things which do not matter, without losing sight of the image they form? or perhaps it is instead that everything matters.

i do not know how this puzzle is resolved.